Colonoscopy

I had a Colonoscopy today. Just a routine procedure that someone goes through when you turn the ripe old age of 50. Basically, your entire colon gets cleaned out and they shove a lense on a tube up your rectum to see if anything is going on. If the find something then they snip off pieces of the inside of your colon and send it out for biopsies. There will be other procedures and exams to follow but I thought I's start with this one. The good news is that the results were great. There is nothing wrong with my colon. The preparation for the procedure was the hard part. It went like this:

Sunday Night 8:00pm - last meal. It's clear fluids from now on until the procedure is done.
Monday Morning - Clear liquids only for the day. No pulp juice, jello, broth, water, tea, coffee and soda. No dairy and avoid anything red or purple. Try to drink at 8 oz of fluid every 1/2 hour.
Monday Afternoon 3:00pm - now the fun part. I have to mix up 32oz of this nasty lemon flavored witches brew and drink 8oz of it every 15-20 minutes without throwing up. OK, i got the first batch down and things are starting to move along. Now I have to mix up another batch and do the same thing all over again. By this time I'm starting to feel very bloated and I've gone to the bathroom maybe 4 times already. No cramping. Just a lot of material and fluid.

I suffer through the second batch of the vile concoction and I'm at the point where I'm only passing liquid. Lots and lots of yellowish liquid. I still have to drink another 32oz of clear liquids before the night os over. My stomach looks like I'm more pregnant than usual and it sounds like there is a thunderstorm in my belly with the occasional downpour.

By the time I get to bed around 10:00 pm, I've pretty much stopped going to the bathroom. The noises continue however. I just hope I don't have an accident in the middle of the night. I did have to get up once to go but no problems.

Tuesday Morning - I wake up and go once. I'm hungry and my stomach is awfully noisy. Lisa and I get over to Saint Louise Hospital at about 9:00am and it's the usual hurry up and wait. They took me about 9:30 am. I had to get into my little gown with just sox on. They gave me a little hat and some booties and some warm blankies. Lisa and I just waited for them to take me away. They gave me an IV in my hand just to hydrate me and a place to put in my medicine. At about 10:45 they take me into the proceddure room where they gave me some forget medicine and told me to roll over on my side. Except for waking up a little a couple of times. I don't remember any of the 20 minute procedure. They took me out into recovery and I stayed there for about 30 minutes. Lisa then drove me home. I did have some very strong gas cramps and severe bloating until I layed down at home. After about 5 minutes in bed, I had 5 or 6 huge long farts and then I felt much better. I rested for about an hour in bed and then got up. I'm feeling fine and had a bagel when I got home and a slice of pizza later. I'm still grumbly and gassy but that will pass. I want to thank my wife, Lisa, for her support and staying with me at the hospital and then driving me home and making me a bagel. I want to thank my daughter, Evelyn, for her love, hugs and support this morning before she went to school.

Some people dread this procedure but I think it it very worthwhile, if you can get past the prep and the after gas issues then the rest is a piece of cake. My brother-in-law had a colonscopy yesterday and they found a very large polyp. It's a good thing he had the procedure done so they could find these things out before something really bad happened.